Thursday, January 14, 2010

No "Good Black Men" Revisited

Sistas,


Before we form our mouths to say “there are no good black men” we need to look at this from a different perspective. Here, we’ll visit the socio-economic factors then we’ll go into personal accountability.


BUT FIRST: It’s one thing to want a man that meets your “standards” aka requirements and it’s another thing to have unattainable standards. Reevaluate those first. Accountability.


It is fact that black men make up the MAJORITY of the prison population (in comparison to any other race&sex) and the MINORITY of the college population. So while you’re getting your master’s master’s, he has been going day to day being “a black man in America.” With this comes a lot: racial profiling, glass ceilings, being over-looked for “good jobs,” “driving while black,” street influences, pressures from every-whicha-way be they psychological, physical, emotional etc.


You HAVE never, and WILL never, walk a DAY in the life of a black man so beware of how you speak of these Kings. Being the advocate for personal accountability, I recommend that we be more conscious of the prejudices we place on our brothers. Check yourself before pointing the finger at anyone.


Maybe you get “dogged” because there is something in YOU that allows that to happen in your Queendom.


Maybe you can’t find “a good man” because of the places YOU’RE looking. Being uber-selective is a gift and a curse. Blinders can only leave you blind; blind to someone good for/to you.


You should know what a good woman is BEFORE you go looking for a “good man.” Know how you should be treated and why you deserve it. That will weed out SO much. Build yourself up before seeking your reflection. BE a Queen if you want a King.


Maybe YOU’RE not ready for what you’re looking for (emotionally, psychologically etc.)


I say all this to say, we should be more conscious of our thoughts, words and actions in reference to our brothers. The “easy way out” is to point the finger. Think about all the of the circumstantial factors before making such a powerful statement about the men with whom our legacy is dependent. There is no us without them and vice versa.


Peace & Unity.


This is a video I came across. I'm not in TOTAL agreement with all of the claims in this video, but I dig where the brother is coming from. Take a look.